‘AbdullahNarrated Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with him):
I had been eager to ask ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) about the two wives of the Prophet ﷺregarding whom Allah, Exalted is He, Says (what means): {If you two [wives] repent to Allah, [it is best], for your hearts have deviated.} [Quran 66:4] (namely, ‘Aa’ishah and Hafsah (may Allah be pleased with them))till I performed the Hajj along with ‘Umar (and on our way back from Hajj) he (may Allah be pleased with him) went aside (to answer the call of nature) and I also went aside along with him carrying a tumbler of water. When he had answered the call of nature and returned. I poured water on his hands from the tumbler and he performed ablution. I said, "O Commanders of the believers! Who were the two ladies from among the wives of the Prophet ﷺ to whom Allah, Exalted is He, Says (what means): {If you two [wives] repent to Allah, [it is best], for your hearts have deviated} [Quran 66:4]? He (may Allah be pleased with him) said, "I am astonished at your question, O Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with them). They were ‘Aa’ishah and Hafsah (may Allah be pleased with them)." Then ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) went on relating the narration and said, "I and a neighbor of mine from the Ansaar, from Banee Umayyah ibn Zayd who used to live in ‘Awaalee Al-Madeenah, used to visit the Prophet ﷺ in turns. He used to go one day, and I another day. When I went, I would bring him the news of what had happened that day regarding the instructions and orders (i.e., the divine revelation) and when he went, he used to do the same for me. We, the people of Quraysh, used to have authority over women, but when we came to live with the Ansaar, we noticed that their women had the upper hand over their men, so our women started acquiring the habits of the women from the Ansaar. Once, I shouted at my wife and she paid me back in my coin and I disliked that she should answer me back. She said, 'Why do you take it ill that I retort upon you? By Allah, the wives of the Prophet ﷺretort upon him, and some of them may not speak with him for the whole day till night.' What she said scared me and I said to her, 'Whoever amongst them does so, will be a great loser.' Then I dressed myself and went to Hafsah and asked her, 'Does any of you keep Allah's Messengerﷺangry all the day long till night?' She (may Allah be pleased with her) replied in the affirmative. I said, 'She is a ruined losing person (and will never have success)! Does not she fear that Allah may get angry for the anger of Allah's Messengerﷺ and thus she will be ruined? Do not ask Allah's Messengerﷺtoo many things, and do not retort upon him in any case, and do not desert him. Demand from me whatever you like, and do not be tempted to imitate your neighbor (i.e., ‘Aa’ishah) in her behavior towards the Prophet ﷺ), for she (i.e., ‘Aa’ishah) is more beautiful than you, and more beloved to Allah's Messengerﷺ. In those days it was rumored that Ghassaan, (a tribe living in Shaam) was getting prepared their horses to invade us. My companion went (to the Prophet ﷺ on the day of his turn, went and returned to us at night and knocked at my door violently, asking whether I was sleeping. I was scared (by the hard knocking) and came out to him. He said that a great thing had happened. I asked him: What is it? Have Ghassaan come? He replied that it was worse and more serious than that, and added that Allah's Messenger ﷺ had divorced all his wives. I said, Hafsah is a ruined loser! I expected that would happen someday.' So, I got dressed and offered the Fajr prayer with the Prophet ﷺ. Then the Prophet ﷺ entered an upper room and stayed there alone. I went to Hafsah and found her weeping. I asked her, 'Why are you weeping? Did not I warn you? Have Allah's Messengerﷺ divorced you all?' She replied, 'I do not know. He is there in the upper room.' I then went out and came to the pulpit and found a group of people around it and some of them were weeping. Then I sat with them for some time, but could not endure the situation. So, I went to the upper room where the Prophet ﷺ was and requested to a black slave of his: "Will you get the permission of (Allah's Messenger) for ‘Umar (to enter)? The slave went in, talked to the Prophet ﷺ about it and came out saying, 'I mentioned you to him but he did not reply.' So, I went and sat with the people who were sitting by the pulpit, but I could not bear the situation, so I went to the slave again and said: "Will you get he permission for ‘Umar? He went in and brought the same reply as before. When I was leaving, the slave called me saying, "Allah's Messengerﷺ has granted you permission." So, I entered upon the Prophet and saw him lying on a bedstead made of date-palm leaves and covered with no mattress, and such mat had left its mark on the body of the Prophet ﷺ, and he was leaning on a leather pillow stuffed with palm fires. I greeted him and while still standing, I said: "Have you divorced your wives?' He ﷺ raised his eyes to me and replied in the negative. Then while still standing, I said chatting: "Will you heed what I say, 'O Allah's Messenger ﷺ! We, the people of Quraysh used to have the upper hand over our women (wives), and when we came to the people whose women had the upper hand over them..." ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) told the whole story (about his wife). "On that the Prophet ﷺsmiled." ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) further said, "I then said, 'I went to Hafsah and said to her: Do not be tempted to imitate your companion (‘Aa’ishah) for she is more beautiful than you and more beloved to the Prophet ﷺ.' The Prophet ﷺ smiled again. When I saw him smiling, I sat down and cast a glance at the room, and by Allah, I could not see anything of importance but three hides. I said (to Allah's Messenger ﷺ), "Invoke Allah to make your followers prosperous for the Persians and the Byzantines have been made prosperous and given worldly luxuries, though they do not worship Allah?' The Prophet ﷺ was leaning then (and on hearing my speech he sat straight) and said, 'O Ibn Al-Khattaab! Do you have any doubt (that the Hereafter is better than this worldly life)? These people have been given rewards of their good deeds in this worldly life only.' I asked the Prophet ﷺ, 'Please ask Allah's forgiveness for me.’ The Prophet ﷺdid not go to his wives because of the secret which Hafsah had disclosed to ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with them), and he said that he would not go to his wives for one month as he was angry with them when Allah admonished him. When twenty-nine days had passed, the Prophet ﷺ went to ‘Aa’ishah first of all. She said to him, 'You took an oath that you would not come to us for one month, and today only twenty-nine days have passed, as I have been counting them day by day.' The Prophet ﷺ said, 'The month is also of twenty-nine days.' That month consisted of twenty-nine days. ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said, 'When the Divine revelation of Choice was revealed, the Prophet ﷺ started with me, saying to me, 'I am telling you something, but you need not hurry to give the reply till you can consult your parents." ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) knew that her parents would not advise her to part with the Prophet ﷺ. The Prophet ﷺsaid that Allah Says (what means): {O Prophet, say to your wives, "If you should desire the worldly life and its adornment, then come, I will provide for you and give you a gracious release.} [Quran 33:28] ‘Aa’ishah said, 'Am I to consult my parents about this? I indeed prefer Allah, Exalted is He, His Messenger ﷺ, and the Hereafter.' After that the Prophet ﷺgave the choice to his other wives and they also gave the same reply as ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) did.”
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Commentary :
Like all married couples, the married life of the Prophet ﷺ was not trouble-free and his wives sometimes saddened him with their overjealously or other annoying attitudes.
In this hadeeth, ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with them) stated that he was keen to ask ‘Umar ibn Al-Khattaab (may Allah be pleased with him) about the two wives of the Prophet ﷺ about whom Allah, Exalted is He, Says (what means): {If you two [wives] repent to Allah, [it is best], for your hearts have deviated.} [Quran 66:4].The Arabic word used in the hadeeth is Saaghat meaning deviated from the obligation and duty, and the ayah means, “If you repent to Allah, Exalted is He, your repentance is justifiable and called for, because your hearts have deviated from the truth and what is obligatory on you towards the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, keeping his secret, being keen on his comfort, and respecting his acts.
Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with them) remained keen on asking his question, but could not do so, out of his reverence for ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him), until the opportunity presented itself when they went together for Hajj. Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with them) related that on their way back from Hajj, ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) went aside to a deserted path, to answer the call of nature and Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with them) accompanied him carrying a tumbler of water, i.e., a small container made of leather used for carrying water. When he had answered the call of nature and returned, Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with them) poured water on his hands from the tumbler and he (may Allah be pleased with him) performed ablution. Afterward, he (may Allah be pleased with him) said, "O Commander of the believers! Who were the two wives of the Prophet ﷺ to whom Allah, Exalted is He, Says (what means): {If you two [wives] repent to Allah, [it is best], for your hearts have deviated} [Quran 66:4]? ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) was astonished at his question, given the fact that Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with them) was well-ayahd in Tafseer and this information should not have missed him. It is also possible that ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) was astonished at his keenness on learning the ambiguous meanings of the Quran as reflected in his question. It was also said that ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) disliked the question. Anyway, he (may Allah be pleased with him) told him that they were ‘Aa’ishah bint Aboo Bakr and Hafsah bint ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with them).
Afterward, ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) went on relating the narration to him and said, “I and a neighbor of mine from the Ansaar,” named Aws ibn Khawlee ibn ‘Abdullah Al-Ansaaree (may Allah be pleased with him) from Banee Umayyah ibn Zayd, “used to live in ‘Awaalee Al-Madeenah,” i.e., the villages near Al-Madeenah, three or four miles away from it in the direction of Najd, “used to visit the Prophet ﷺ in turns. He used to go one day, and I another day. When I went, I would bring him the news of what had happened that day regarding the instructions and orders (i.e., the divine revelation) and when he went, he used to do the same for me. We, the people of Quraysh, used to have authority over women,” and they had no authority over us, “but when we came to live with the Ansaar, we noticed that their women had the upper hand over their men.” It means that the men from the Ansaar were rather more lenient with their wives. He (may Allah be pleased with him) added: “So, our women started acquiring the habits of the women from the Ansaar,” copying their attitudes towards their husbands. “Once, I shouted at my wife and she paid me back in my coin and I disliked that she should answer me back. She said, 'Why do you take it ill that I retort upon you? By Allah, the wives of the Prophet ﷺretort upon him, and some of them may not speak with him for the whole day till night.'” Another version of the hadeeth recorded in Saheeh Al-Bukhaaree and Saheeh Muslim reads: “How strange is it that you, O son of Khattaab, do not like anyone to retort upon you, whereas your daughter retorts upon Allah's Messenger ﷺ until he spends the day angry!” ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) added: “What she said scared me and I said to her, 'Whoever amongst them does so, will be a great loser!'”
Then ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) stated that he got dressed and went to Hafsah and asked her, “Do any of you keep Allah's Messengerﷺangry all day long till night?” She (may Allah be pleased with her) replied in the affirmative. He (may Allah be pleased with him) said, “She is a ruined losing person (and will never have success)! Does not she fear that Allah, Exalted is He, may get angry for the anger of His Messengerﷺ and thus she will be ruined?” ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) advised his daughter not to ask Allah's Messengerﷺfor too many things, not to retort upon him in any case, and never to desert him even if he ﷺ did. He (may Allah be pleased with him) also told her to demand whatever she wanted and needed from him, and added: “Do not be tempted to imitate your neighbor (i.e., ‘Aa’ishah),” meaning your co-wife, since the Arabs used to refer to co-wives as neighbors, as they share the same husband, “in her behavior towards the Prophet ﷺ), for she (i.e., ‘Aa’ishah) is more beautiful than you, and more beloved to Allah's Messengerﷺ.” ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) urged his daughter to follow his advice and warned her against being tempted by the fact that the Prophet ﷺ might overlook such behavior and attitude from ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with him) to follow her example. He (may Allah be pleased with him) meant that he ﷺ may tolerate ‘Aa’ishah’s behavior given her special status in his heart, and this would not be the case for Hafsah (may Allah be pleased with her)!
He (may Allah be pleased with him) added: “In those days it was rumored that Ghassaan,” (a tribe living in Shaam) from Qahtaan tribe who left the area around Ma’rib Dam, scattered, and settled by a well called Ghassaan and therefore they were named after it and lived in Shaam. He (may Allah be pleased with him) added: “Ghassaan was getting prepared their horses to invade us (Muslims). My companion went (to the Prophet ﷺ on the day of his turn), and heard the he ﷺ had divorced all his wives. He went at night and knocked at ‘Umar’s door violently, asking whether he was sleeping. ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) got scared (by the hard knocking) and came out to him. He said that a great thing had happened. ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) asked him: “What is it? Have Ghassaan come?” He replied that it was worse and more serious than that, and added that Allah's Messenger ﷺ had divorced all his wives. It is possible that the rumor was circulated by the hypocrites that he ﷺ divorced them, contrary to the truth as he ﷺ only forsook them, and this was unusual of him, therefore people thought that he ﷺ had divorced them.
‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) said, “Hafsah is a ruined loser! I expected that would happen someday,” because retorting upon one’s husband incurs his anger and this may ultimately end in divorce. He (may Allah be pleased with him) named Hafsah in particular because she was his daughter and he had just warned her of the gravity of such an attitude.
‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) got dressed, went to the Prophet ﷺ and offered the Fajr prayer with him. Then the Prophet ﷺ entered an upper room, where they used to store food, and stayed there alone, forsaking his wives. ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) added: “I went to Hafsah and found her weeping. I asked her, 'Why are you weeping? Did I not warn you (of angering, retorting upon, or deserting Allah's Messengerﷺ)? Has Allah's Messengerﷺ divorced you all?' She replied, 'I do not know. He ﷺ is there in the upper room.' ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) went out and came to the pulpit and found a group of people around it and some of them, below ten, were weeping. He (may Allah be pleased with him) added: “Then I sat with them for some time, but could not endure the situation,” meaning that he (may Allah be pleased with him) was concerned with the news about the Prophet ﷺ and that he had divorced his wives, including his daughter! He (may Allah be pleased with him) added: “So, I went to the upper room where the Prophet ﷺ was and requested a black slave of his, named Rabaah: ‘Will you get the permission of (Allah's Messengerﷺ) for ‘Umar (to enter)?’ The slave went in, talked to the Prophet ﷺ about it and came out saying, 'I mentioned you to him but he ﷺ did not reply.' So, I went and sat with the people who were sitting by the pulpit, but I could not bear the situation, so I went to the slave again and said: ‘Will you get his permission for ‘Umar?’ He went in and brought the same reply as before. When I was leaving, the slave called me saying, ‘Allah's Messengerﷺ has granted you permission.’ So, I entered upon the Prophet ﷺ and saw him lying on a bedstead made of date-palm leaves and covered with no mattress, and the mat had left its mark on the body of the Prophet ﷺ, and he was leaning on a leather pillow stuffed with palm fibres. I greeted him and while still standing, I said: ‘Have you divorced your wives?' He ﷺ raised his eyes to me and replied in the negative.
While still standing, I said, chatting: ‘Will you heed what I say, O Allah's Messenger ﷺ!’” ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) was trying to see if the Prophet ﷺ would forgive them or say something to comfort him and ease his anger. He (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “We, the people of Quraysh used to have the upper hand over our women (wives), and when we came to the people whose women had the upper hand over them..." ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) told the whole story (about his wife). "On that the Prophet ﷺsmiled." ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) further said, "I then said, 'I went to Hafsah and said to her: Do not be tempted to imitate your companion (‘Aa’ishah) for she is more beautiful than you and more beloved to the Prophet ﷺ.' The Prophet ﷺ smiled again. When I saw him smiling, I sat down and cast a glance at the room, and by Allah, I could not see anything of importance but three hides,” indicating the shabby appearance of the room where the Prophet ﷺ stayed. ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) added: “I said (to Allah's Messenger ﷺ), ’Invoke Allah to make your Ummah (followers) prosperous, for the Persians and the Byzantines have been made prosperous and given worldly luxuries, though they do not worship Allah?' The Prophet ﷺ was leaning then, and on hearing my speech he sat straight, disliking my statement, and said, 'O Ibn Al-Khattaab! Do you have any doubt (that the Hereafter is better than this worldly life)? These people, i.e., the Persians and Byzantines, have been given rewards for their good deeds in this worldly life only.'” Thereupon, ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) asked the Prophet ﷺ to seek Allah's forgiveness for him, for his boldness to say so in his presence.
The Prophet ﷺdeserted his wives because of the secret which Hafsah had disclosed to ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with them), and this hadeeth did not underline the details of that secret. It was reported in Saheeh Al-Bukhaaree and Saheeh Muslim that the Prophet ﷺ used to spend time with Zaynab bint Jahsh, and that he once drank honey at her house, so Hafsah and ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with them) agreed that the one whom the Prophet ﷺ visited first should say, “I notice that you have an odor of Maghaafeer (i.e., plural of Mughfur, the gum of a kind of mimosa, the odor of which is unpleasant)! Have you eaten some?” When he ﷺ visited one of them and she said that to him he ﷺ replied, “Do not worry; I drank some honey at the house of Zaynab bint Jahsh, but I swear that I shall not do it again. Do not tell anyone of that.” It was also said that the reason was not a particular event, but rather that his wives did many things that made him angry.
He ﷺ had said that he would not go to his wives for one month, as he was very angry with them when Allah, Exalted is He, admonished him. Allah, Exalted is He, Says (what means): {O Prophet, why do you prohibit [yourself from] what Allah has made lawful for you, seeking the approval of your wives? And Allah is Forgiving and Merciful.} [Quran 66:1].
When twenty-nine days had passed, the Prophet ﷺ went to ‘Aa’ishah first of all. She (may Allah be pleased with her) said to him, “You took an oath that you would not come to us for one month, and today only twenty-nine days have passed, as I have been counting them day by day.” The Prophet ﷺ said, “The month is also of twenty-nine days!'”That month consisted of twenty-nine days.
‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said, “When the Divine revelation of Choice was revealed, the Prophet ﷺ started with me.” She (may Allah be pleased with her) was referring to the ayaat that read (what means): {O Prophet, say to your wives, "If you should desire the worldly life and its adornment, then come, I will provide for you and give you a gracious release. * But if you should desire Allah and His Messenger and the home of the Hereafter - then indeed, Allah has prepared for the doers of good among you a great reward."} [Quran 33: 28-29].
Based on these ayaat, the Prophet ﷺ gave his wives the choice for him to divorce them and give them the due provision, or retain his marriage to them and they should endure the straitened circumstances.
He ﷺ said to me, “I am telling you something, but you need not hurry to give the reply till you consult your parents." ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) knew that her parents would not advise her to part with the Prophet ﷺ. Heﷺrecited the two ayaat to her, and ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said, “Am I to consult my parents about this? I, indeed, prefer Allah, Exalted is He, His Messenger ﷺ, and the Hereafter.“ After that the Prophet ﷺgave the choice to his other wives and they also gave the same reply as ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) did.
The hadeeth highlights the merits of ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him).
It also underlines the asceticism of the Prophet ﷺ, and the virtue of denouncing worldly pleasures and being content with a humbled life, being a distinct quality of the Prophets.
It also emphasizes that worldly pleasures are fleeting, unlike the eternal bliss of the Hereafter.
It is deduced from the hadeeth that a woman is liable to punishment for disclosing her husband’s secrets.
It is also inferred therefrom that even a rational and wise woman may consult her parents or seek the opinion of whom she trusts about her own affairs. It is also deduced that the Prophet ﷺ used to smile back at those who tried to make him laugh out of courtesy.
The hadeeth also highlights keenness in seeking knowledge, taking turns in checking the latest updates on the divine revelation and being concerned with such pursuits.
It also underlines the merits of the Mother of the Believers, ‘Aai’shah (may Allah be pleased with her). .